The Summer Of ‘What The Fuck?’

2017-07-21 Miss Poison Writing Honesty, July, Mourning, Musings, Observations, Pain, Pieces Of Me, Poison In Lethal Doses, Sadness, Writing

I promised myself certain aspects of this year would be better, and they have been, but the rest of the year, thus far, has been a shit-show of epic proportions. I am so thrown by it all, I probably say "What the fuck?!" fifty times a day, if not more. I've talked about it, so … Continue reading The Summer Of ‘What The Fuck?’

Writing With Purpose

2017-07-182017-07-20 Miss Poison Boundaries, Writing Authenticity, Being Real, Boundaries, Honesty, Musings, Pieces Of Me, Poison In Lethal Doses, Privacy, Purpose, Writing

I've had a couple of rough weeks, though in truth, I'd have to say "rough decade", but I'd prefer to focus on the present. Some of it I would prefer to address in a future piece that is nearly completed, but the rest I'd like to get out of my system. Unfortunately, I don't even … Continue reading Writing With Purpose

Incurable

2017-07-042017-07-04 Miss Poison Writing Doctors, Emotional Support, Family, Friends, Honesty, Incurable Illness, Life, Musings, Pain, Patients, Pieces Of Me, Poison In Lethal Doses, Reality, Suicide, Truth, Twitter, Writing

***Potential Trigger Warning*** Friday night, I stupidly read my new diagnosis for the first time. And then I sat here in tears. The old diagnosis, which I've had for a long time, is … Continue reading Incurable

Not Okay

2017-06-302017-07-01 Miss Poison Writing Depression, Honesty, Musings, Physical Pain, Stress, Unhappiness, Writing

I'm not okay. I've tried to be, but ultimately, the first person I have to be honest with is myself. If you start lying to yourself, you can convince the entire world that everything's fine while the house burns down around you. Everything is absolutely NOT fine because I am NOT fine. Today was my … Continue reading Not Okay

I Don’t Have Time For This

2017-06-092017-06-28 Miss Poison Writing Feelings, Honesty, Musings, Observations, Pieces Of Me, Poison In Lethal Doses, Stress, Time, Writing

"I am a migraine, that occasionally gets to be a human-being." 😦 In preparation to meet with my new neurologist next month, I forwarded a copy of my current migraine report to myself so I can print it and bring it with me. In one month, which was recent, I counted thirty migraine days. That's … Continue reading I Don’t Have Time For This

Privacy Isn’t A Setting

2017-06-062017-06-06 Miss Poison Writing Being Real, Brutal Honesty, June, Musings, Pieces Of Me, Poison In Lethal Doses, Privacy, Writing

A few days ago it dawned on me precisely what bugs me most about some of my family members. To be fair, it's probably in my top ten things that bug me about them. It's not just the fact that their combined I.Q. is my shoe size (I'm a nine, in case you were wondering.), … Continue reading Privacy Isn’t A Setting

Memorial Day Silence

2017-05-282017-05-29 Miss Poison Writing Family, Feelings, Friends, Honesty, Memorial Day Weekend, Musings, My Point Of View, Pieces Of Me, Poison In Lethal Doses, Relationships, Solitude, Thoughts, Toxic Relationships, Writing

I got to spend half of this holiday weekend solo. I'd forgotten how much I enjoy "me time". I was able to enjoy a long walk, a manicure, and have lunch by myself. Even though the walk killed my legs (I've walked so much the last few days, I'm probably going to be crawling in … Continue reading Memorial Day Silence

It’s Possible To Feel Worse

2017-05-06 Miss Poison Writing Agony, Fibromyalgia, Health, Migraines, Musings, Pain, Pieces Of Me, Poison In Lethal Doses, Stress, Writing

Just when I thought it wasn't possible to feel any worse than I have these last few weeks, I woke up this morning and the pain is at an all-time new high for INSANITY. You know those pain scales every doctor's office has posted with idiotic faces? There is no logical way to say "Oh, … Continue reading It’s Possible To Feel Worse

Too Many Thoughts That I Can’t Process

2017-05-03 Miss Poison Writing Health, Migraines, Musings, Nausea, Pain, Pieces Of Me, Poison In Lethal Doses, Weakness, Writing

Today is one of those days where I just can't seem to break myself out of how bad I feel. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. I caught myself last night, while making dinner, realizing just how done I am. It wasn't a temporary feeling. It was a "What's the point in this life?" feeling. I'm still … Continue reading Too Many Thoughts That I Can’t Process

The Never-Ending Excitement

2017-04-29 Miss Poison Writing Honesty, Musings, Pain, Pieces Of Me, Poison In Lethal Doses, Writers, Writing

I swear, I'm radiating unhappiness. Thursdays' appointment made me feel like a fucking fraud. Despite the fact that I KNOW I suffer greatly, you cannot see anything I suffer from. It's like being slapped in the face a bit. People can't help but stare at you, because they're questioning your validity of illness without knowing … Continue reading The Never-Ending Excitement