Time Is Ungovernable…

“Time is ungovernable, but grief presents us with a choice: what do we do with the savage energies of bereavement? What do we do with the memory – or in the memory – of the beloved? Some commemorate love with statuary, but behavior, too, is a memorial, as is a well-lived life. In death, there is always the promise of hope. The key is opening, rather than numbing, ourselves to pain. Above all, we must show our children how to celebrate existence in all its beauty, and how to get up after life has knocked us down, time and again. Half-dead, we stand. And together, we salute love. Because in the end, that’s all that matters. How hard we loved, and how hard we tried.” ―Antonella Gambotto-Burke

Dear fellow motherless daughters: Here’s how I’ve learned to cope on Mother’s Day


The other day, someone who’d just met me asked what I’d be doing with my mother this Sunday. It was such a jolting question to come from someone who didn’t even know my name, but I saw her apology, and her inability to understand that not everyone has a living parent to celebrate with, after she tried to absorb my polite response. She then changed the subject to marriage and I was even more annoyed. 🙄 I honestly thought I’d be asked about my pap smear, next!

Its important to be sensitive to others. I am not the only motherless daughter in the world, but sometimes, it feels like I am. I am grateful to friends who’ve basically adopted me and made sure that I don’t have to break down and be upset. I’m also grateful to those who intentionally harmed me, so I could see them for who they truly are.