Mid-Week Humor & a Little (Cat) Back Story

I’ve been off all week. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ I don’t feel like myself and I don’t feel good. It’s an obvious rough patch health-wise.

My right hand is healing, but the deeply damaged spot, which is much deeper than I originally thought, is still a problem. It shouldn’t hurt this much. I’ve done all the correct things to attempt to speed up the healing process, but ultimately, this is going to scar. Some of the smaller areas are almost fully healed, and other spots are a bit swollen. I’ll live. Thankfully, the skin on our hands and feet regenerates quicker than the skin on the rest of the body. Besides, scars teach us lessons.

Next week, I have three appointments on back-to-back-to-back days. I don’t have to go anywhere for the last one, I just have to answer the phone, but one of those appointments is a procedure and while used to it, I still get a little anxious thinking about it. I will be fine, unless my doctor is feeling heavy-handed next week. I willingly submit myself to small amounts of torture; I should probably see a doctor about that. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Today’s image perfectly captures how quickly Kitten adapted once returning home from the vet. She was suspicious that night, quickly eating her dinner and going to bed. They both stayed away from me and neither one felt great from the new vaccines, but Sunday she was back to being sweet and now she’s completely herself again. She’s been taking care of me. My migraines have been torturous and they’re causing additional insomnia, so every night she sits with me, hangs out, watches me type or read, and then she curls up with me when I am able to sleep. She is right by my elbow as I type this. I was so happy when she came to me and asked to be let under the covers. It’s been our thing ever since she was eight weeks old. The first night she was home, she jumped up on my bed, curled up in a ball on my left side, and didn’t budge until morning. Mind you, Cat was hissing at her and spitting; completely enraged that this new animal who didn’t smell like family had taken over. She didn’t bat an eye, because she felt safe. They still sleep in the same spots they chose as kittens, at least when they’re with me.

When I’m really not 100% okay (and saying I’m fine), they jump up, go to their chosen spots, and put me in the middle of their love fest. Those are precious moments when you realize you’ve raised these little creatures and they love you, because they know we’re a team. They definitely look to me for guidance, for reactions, and sometimes, when I laugh, I think they’re deeply concerned that something is wrong with me. They stare at me like I’m about to die, and then they look at each other, as if one of them is more responsible for me than the other. This only makes me laugh harder. Their expressions are so human, so full of concern. G-d genuinely knew what He was doing when he created cats; people, not so much.

Great things are coming up for me, and as a result, I do feel overwhelmed at times. These next few weeks, I have to remind myself who I am and not allow an ounce of doubt to chase after me. It’s easier said than done. Wish me luck. ๐Ÿ™‚

I’ll be back soon. Be well, everyone.

Sedate Me

Yes, I’m still writing. Yes, I am still reading (Check out my Goodreads challenge. I’ve read 111 books, so far. Crazy, right? Research pays off!). But for the next few weeks, I think I need to take it easy.

Today I took Cat and Kitten to the vet. I was already stressed out and barely keeping myself together in terms of appearing mildly sane. Naturally, Cat, who is sweet, loving, quiet, flirty with all men who have a Russian or Ukrainian accent, and an overall, “I want to be with the people.” kind of cat freaked out and used her back claws to rip me open. I can’t open and close my right hand without serious pain. If I hadn’t moved my hand, which is what allowed her to get into contact with my wrist and forearm, I probably would have needed stitches because she was so relentless and putting up such a physical struggle. This quiet little being, who barely ever meows, used up a fifteen year quota of meows and screeches today, and she’s not even eight years old.

Every time she meowed, my panic reached a new level of traumatized. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ However, I knew I was doing the right thing for her health. Some of the news wasn’t great, unfortunately. I had forgotten that her breed is prone to certain genetic predispositions. I’m upset, for her, but will do whatever is necessary to let her live the rest of her life in peace and good health. I can’t spend money when I’m dead, but I can work harder and recoup whatever goes towards her care moving forward. Her breed is known to live between 12 and 20 years, which is precisely why I adopted her. I wanted a cat who I felt I could give a good life, but also one who’d be by my side through a specific chapter of my life. I’m aiming for 20. <Fingers crossed.>

Kitten wasn’t happy about any of this either, but I got her into her carrier with far less fanfare, and she got a 99% clean bill of health. The fact that she weighs almost two pounds more than my Bombay makes me question their scale. Especially since she is always running around, jumping, and playing. She’s much more physically active, and always has been. This is where I disagree with the vet. I know that if I change anything in their diet, it can lead to thyroid issues. I’ve dealt with that twice before, and I will not put them on a different diet unless they require it for their long-term health. I measure everything out carefully. Also, when a vet encourages you to make sure they get extra treats to help with health issues, you don’t feel as bad as I do since I feel like they’re constantly in my face begging me to give in (Which I often do, because I’m a sucker.). They are shameless little con artists.

The downside of a day like today is day’s end when you are exhausted beyond measure and hurt from head to toe. Add in poor sleep, and this is ridiculous. Hopefully I can feel less rushed tomorrow and sleep in a bit. I need it. And I need to replenish cat supplies.

In the future, can we sedate the owner who was triggered today, right along with the cats? Is there a tranquilzer we can use? I’m asking for future reference, of course. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, folks. I’ll be on the mend. The sliced part of my hand might slow me down this coming week, but I will do my best.

Until next time…

All I want is a Pina Colada.

For Your Consideration…

Working on half a dozen different things for the site. Unfortunately, I am plagued by a bout of migraines which aren’t responding to medication. I think this will be my last month taking Ubrelvy as a rescue med. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ Maybe my doctor will have another option when I see her in three weeks. I try not to use this stuff at all, but when a migraine hits and effects your neck, mouth, face, and the entirety of your skull, you’ve got to cut yourself some slack.

I feel bad that I’m not accomplishing anything today, but being coherent enough to write this is falling under the, “good enough” category I rarely, if ever, settle for.

Here’s an updated photo of Kitten to make up for my lack of words. She was being especially cute yesterday while I was working. I only came away from the altercation with two scratches (Her nails are currently longer than mine. Vet appointment in a week and a half for the terrors.) and a smack. She asks for belly rubs and then grabs my hand like she’s human. She doesn’t mean to hurt me. She’s quite gentle and sweet, really. Yet, like me, SHE BITES. ๐Ÿ™‚

Have a good one. I’ll be back ASAP with something that is hopefully more interesting.

First Caturday of February

I laugh because my cats stand like statues a lot, and would try this if I hadn’t trained them as kittens not to get onto the kitchen counters or the dining room table. I freak out if they’re anywhere near the stove, so they seem to remember my reaction, unless they’re trying to test me, and then I do catch them. Some of their, “testing” is actually cat curiosity, more than anything else.

Ungrateful Caturday

My cats have decided I’m merely a person who feeds them and rewards them for existing with expensive treats, which they think they should receive every few hours, so long as I’m working and they can annoy me. And they’ve taken to jumping on my head and screeching if they aren’t fed by 8:00 a.m.

As I type this, they are both standing near a mostly closed door, peeking in on me. If I move, so do their heads. This goes on for hours. I’ve become human furniture that requires regular cat spies. Next time, I’m ordering cuddly cats.

I Didn’t Sign Up For This

I’m having one of those days where anxiety & stress are overwhelming. Two steps away from hyperventilating, overwhelming. No, I don’t need pity or to talk to anyone. I’m safe and will (probably) live to see another day.

I considered calling my doctor or texting someone, and then chose not to do either. I’m that strong friend who will NOT burden you with my problems because if a medical professional can’t fix it, how will you? For me, this is common sense stuff, but I also cannot allow anyone to get too close anymore and harm me, which happened twice last year. Never again will I permit that. Trust MUST be earned. I have never trusted women less in my life, but that’s where I am now.

Kitten is my familiar, and if I’m not okay, she KNOWS. She started shrieking to get me into another room. She brought me toys and gave me her, “Come on, you’ll feel better soon.” look that is the most human expression you’ll see if you’ve never seen humanity in an animal before. I’ve lucked out; the cats in my life have always been exceptionally human (I have also had two dogs that I immediately knew were once human. I cried each time because neither one could be mine.). Each time I’ve implied this, someone else has noticed it and acknowledged that they see it, too.

I followed her and threw toys around for her, marveling at her energy and the heights she’ll reach. She played happily, but kept looking back at me. If I threw a few toys and walked away, she’d start shrieking again. She has the biggest mouth, so when she makes a certain sound, it’s alarming and you run to see what’s wrong. Today, I was what was wrong, and she knew it.

Suddenly, Cat came running down the stairs because she heard my voice. She’s ALWAYS listening for me. Be it noon or three a.m., if I breathe, she’s going to follow me. I can cough and she’ll come to check on me like it’s her sole purpose in life.

I don’t have to doubt the intentions of any animal I’ve raised, but people? People will give you reasons to doubt, to not trust. People who think everyone is innately good are so off base, and I cannot imagine being that level of naive. It’s a stupidity I cannot afford.

We are all different. We all have shit we are dealing with, and things we are doing to better ourselves.

Me? All of the above. I’m not a negative person due to bad days and painful struggles. When I achieve goals, I know I have earned my place. My achievements aren’t false and I don’t purchase my goals.

No one hands you anything in life. Not in truth. Be mindful of invisible strings attached and the expectations others have when you allow them that level of access. Use your fucking brain!

They say domestic cats are still preprogrammed with certain wilderness skills. It’s often why they will sleep with their “person” or “people”. My cats have their own beds and they use them, but when I’m hurting, be it physically or emotionally, they’ve got my back. People? Not so much.

Kitten is my constant sidekick. Writing? She’s next to me. Trying not to meltdown? She will come to comfort me. I know she loves me because she will bust open the door to my room and just stay by my side. She doesn’t stand on ceremony.

Cat is different. She requires an invitation in calligraphy. She had me for the first year of her life, and while she needed a companion so she’d stop attacking me, she officially outgrew this need a few years ago. To this day, she will still crawl into my lap like she did as a tiny bean, and she won’t move. She thinks she’s still about three pounds. She is sweet and sassy, but ultimately they are both fiercely protective of me, even when I’m asleep. They have woken me from nightmares and cuddled close when I feel cold and completely empty. They often treat me like I am the mother cat. The way they greet me is the way a kitten would greet its mother. It’s beautiful and a little sad because I know they were both taken from their mothers too soon. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

Not to knock my real friends, but these are my girls. I know they will be with me until the end of their lives. I made a commitment when I filled out their adoption forms, wrapped them up in a warm blanket, and put them in a carrier to take them home. They immediately trusted me. A cat can live over twenty years. Every single day, I pray I have that long with them. They are such blessings and I never worry about them secretly judging me. I already know they do, but I also know they’d kill for me.

I didn’t sign up for all this pain and strife, but I did sign up to love my little balls of trouble. People will come and go, but your cats will stay by your side because they know your heart better than anyone else. That’s unconditional love in the truest form.

Sorry dog owners; I can only speak for what’s mine.

ยฉ 2020 by Lisa Marino and Blackbird Serenity, LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.