People Love To Say…

“People love to say everything will be okay, but sometimes it’s just not true. Sometimes you hit a brick wall, a limit, a point of exhaustion, a boundary or your last straw. You may feel so strong and have every good intention, and yet you still get mercilessly beaten down and defeated. You just can’t win them all, and when that time comes you will have to accept it. To not accept a defeat is to be defeated again and again without mercy. Sometimes mercy is simple acceptance. If you are exhausted or defeated, sometimes mercy is letting go.” —Bryant McGill

Family First

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Yesterday morning my brother was admitted into the hospital with what is, as of now, a form of heart failure. The doctors are baffled; stating that they don’t know how this happened because he is far too young. Unfortunately, he is far from being out of the woods. He is scheduled for a serious procedure today, and I am sadly all too familiar with it.

My original post probably won’t go up today because I’m sitting here speechless, sick to my stomach. I have words, there are things I want to say, but I feel the need to keep it inside for now.

I don’t talk about my personal life an awful lot, and there’s a reason for that. Most of you that know me off of this page are my friends in everyday life. You have the ability to call me, e-mail me, text, or visit, etc. But for those that do not personally know me, my heart, or the deeper aspects of my life, I tend to keep those things to myself. There’s plenty of people telling their life stories on blogs, but this is not a blog for me; it is my platform as a writer. I am a writer, I have been for 28 years. I’m not a blogger, at least not here, but perhaps that is just semantics for some people. I, however, stand by those words.

This week, I worry (It’s a Jewish woman thing.). I will try to push past the pit of hell inside my stomach. I pray for healing, for modern medicine to do what it’s supposed to do. I pray that some dietary changes reverse this, as a doctor told him it could/would, with some serious effort on his part, but only if it’s a specific type of heart failure.

The words “Life Vest” were used. That kind of technology did not exist when a doctor wanted to crack open my mother’s chest ten years ago and attach a defibrillator to her heart. Her doctor was over 80 (I wanted to punch this man at least three times, but it would have been disrespectful. I told her if he’d been 60, I’d have knocked his teeth out.), did not care to explain the procedure in a gentle manner, and was so rude that he only managed to turn the issue into a “Hell no!”, as opposed to “Can we discuss this?” Everything is being thoroughly explained to my brother, and for that I am grateful. He’s also smart enough to ask questions that other people might not think of and then discuss his options with me, that way there’s a proactive person involved in his recovery.

I know that many of you will understand if I am silent for a while; that family comes first. Today, and maybe most days, I am my Grandmother’s granddaughter. I do put my family first, but I am not afraid to handle the tough stuff. That’s why during the worst times in my life, I handle what needs to be handled, even if I’m not happy about doing it. Even if it breaks me.

Lack of a family unit has really bothered me these last few years. As I sat here yesterday making calls, I realized that about a dozen people did not need to be called, because they don’t give a fuck on a good day, and I will not give them the satisfaction of lapping up misery. I appreciate the people who offered up prayers, but I very nearly told someone off who made an off-hand comment without knowing precisely what is wrong. I had to take a huge step back, realizing that I’m emotional and snapping when you’re upset is not conducive to quality communication with others.

It would be hard not to be upset, angry (because I have tried for YEARS to take every bad thing out of his hands when I knew it was being over-done.), frustrated, and scared. I wouldn’t be human if I felt nothing. But I do feel, and I pray that this procedure holds answers as to the how and why. I pray to all that is holy that this is merely a bump in the long road of life. I pray that my brother sees the error of his ways, realizes he is being given a second chance, and takes that opportunity instead of squandering his brilliant mind.

I thank the doctors and nurses caring for him and the four different people who stopped him from an attempt to sneak into the parking lot for a cigarette! I’m embarrassed he’d stoop so low. They all yelled at him (His words were “They bitched me out!” I said nothing, because I feel he deserved it.), and he was later given a patch, so I am praying this is the end to me saying “You need to quit smoking before it kills you.” My brother may not be receptive to my direct honesty, but he’s taking it from doctors and nurses and I think that in and of itself is a positive thing.

I hope I’ll be able to say something more definitive in the next few days. In the meantime, I’m packing and trying to do all that I can for my brother. Because no matter how big a pain in the ass he is, and my GOD, I swear I inherited a big baby, he’s still MY brother. No one else alive can say that, and I told him the same thing. “No one else alive can say that I am their sister, so stop acting like no one cares about you.” I yell because I care, so when I stop yelling, he’d better start worrying.

As of now, I do not know with any certainty whether his medical expenses will be completely covered. If they aren’t, I will be posting a link at a later date to a fundraiser where even the smallest donation will help, but I will only do so if there’s a huge issue.

Thank you for listening to my insanity this morning. Have a good Wednesday, everyone. 🙂

copyright © 2015 by Lisa Marino & Blackbird Serenity LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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Full Hunter’s Moon In Taurus

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Tonight is the Full Hunter’s Moon, named so because people would use the brightness of this Moon to go hunting and gather meat for their families. It is also known as The Blood Moon because between now and Samhain/Halloween was the harvest of flesh, it was the time when the farming community would slaughter cattle and preserve the meat to last through the winter months.

Tonight’s Full Moon is rising in Taurus. This is a time of great change. The universe is giving us so many gifts and chances now, don’t be afraid to take them and to dream of bigger and better things, ask for more, do more, be more. Look at what may be holding you back and get rid of it, the Taurus Full Moon is about new starts, getting rid of the old and bringing in the new.

So much of what has been suppressed is coming to the light now and shining so brightly that we cannot ignore it any longer. This Full Moon is about truth and seeing what is really there, not what we want to see. In life we can often see illusions about ourselves, illusions about others, and illusions about our world. All of these will start crumbling away so we can rebuild on what is real and true.

This Full Moon is a time of healing and cleansing, of getting rid of our negative junk, and moving ourselves into a new and positive direction. Look at all the good things in your life and look at how to improve upon the bad things. It’s time to take a deep look within ourselves and become more aware of what makes us feel comfortable and secure.

With this potent Taurus energy, we have the chance to make important changes in our lives. It’s time to make some solid, yet realistic plans for the future.

Tonight’s Full Moon has an earthy, yet romantic quality and will bring a new wave of calm and peace with it. The gentle dusting of energy brought by this Full Moon will allow us all to restore and recharge our batteries and perhaps feel even more comfortable with our situation and where we are at. We will see with clarity what we need to do to heal and grow. Now is also the time to really get in touch with your passions and desires and work on making them a reality.

Have a blessed Full Moon & may the Goddess watch over you.

Full written credit goes to Wicca Teachings.
Edited by Lisa Marino. 
The moon was truly enormous and bright last night. I tried taking photos with my cell phone and tablet, but none of them were able to capture the beauty of what I was seeing. I hope you all got a chance to see it in its full glory. 🙂

If You Can Tell Stories…

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I disagree. If it didn’t matter how you write, every idiot who thinks they’re the next J.K. Rowling would be published. Bookstores would be overrun with poorly written material that some idiot behind a desk thought would make money, as opposed to truly believing in a story or the author behind it.

Writing is a business. Once the manuscript you work your ass off on is submitted, it’s all business, you are not a person to these people. When someone tells you that your hard work isn’t marketable, even if you have an audience that would happily read it, it’s a let down emotionally. I know many people who’ve left a writing career due to a failed book, or a second manuscript not being picked up by their publisher, etc. They got fed up with the business aspect and decided to throw themselves into other creative endeavors.

I think the right people (those experienced in the individual genres people submit in, not a handful of people who make these decisions) should be reading the manuscripts that get submitted and pushing hard for what is truly good. I read way too many crappy stories from established authors who push out a book or two each year, and are clearly half-assing it. That 100% matters to me as both writer and reader.

Prayers & Tears

justlikeI contemplated being silent today because I’m not in a good mood, but I’m also too upset to pretend.

I’ve had less than five hours of sleep. I tried going back to bed an hour ago, but I am unable to focus on genuine rest. That usually means doing what I always do when there are thoughts running through my head; write.

My brother is sick. By “sick”, I do not mean he has a cold or the flu, I mean that he is going into the hospital tonight. Why wait? Because he “doesn’t want to ruin my day”. It’s not meant to make me feel guilty, he’s just utilizing God given guilt.

When I tried encouraging him to “just go” (He totally inherited the stubbornness from my Mom.), he refused, saying he could go tonight “after I celebrate”. I even offered to go with him, which he doesn’t want, not unless major surgery is being performed. He’s not trying to be dramatic, he just is. 😦 He’s also conscious of the fact that nearly every birthday I have sucks in some way, and that he’s usually the cause if I, myself, am not stuck in bed sick as a dog (in the traditional way).

Last night, he informed me of all his final plans. Plans I am meant to carry out, some of which include organ donation. I’ve had to hear people’s “final wishes” more times than I care to count, so last night was too much. My eyes are swollen from crying and my stomach hurts wondering if this is it, if some horrible health issue is going to rob me of the only remaining sibling I have left. Very real possibilities. When he got a clean bill of health three years ago, I was surprised, and relieved, but a lot has changed since then and I am sick with worry.

You know that one stubborn family member who would rather risk his/her own hearing than go to the emergency room for a horrible ear infection?! That’s my brother. Not once, not twice, but three times. The first time he did it, he did lose significant hearing in his left ear because he waited an extra day before going to the ER. The last ear infection was so bad that he now accuses me of raising my voice when I speak at a normal tone. I can whisper, he’ll say I yelled.

Today is not about me. Today is about praying for my brother and what he is going through. It is me praying that he did not have a heart attack and isn’t in congestive heart failure, and that nothing more is going on, though I suspect there is based on what he is saying hurts. Both of my Grandfathers died from heart attacks, but one died at 40, leaving behind a wife, a fifteen year old, and a five year old. My brother started taking aspirin several years ago to “prevent” that from happening to him, but he made no other changes that could have been beneficial. That’s why I’m scared for him, and that’s why I’m sick to death over this.

I will half-heartedly do some important things that need to be done this morning into the early afternoon hours, but after that, I am forcing his ass to the hospital, even if I have to drag him there by his balls. He usually hallucinates when they medicate him, so that would mean being told rather loudly that I am “trying to pull out his IV” or “embarrassing him” when all I’m doing is sitting quietly, or pacing the hall outside a room. I will spend the evening waiting to hear what his prognosis is.

No matter what you believe in, I ask that you say a little prayer today. No one deserves to lose a loved one and no one as young as my brother deserves to go through this.

copyright © 2015 by Lisa Marino & Blackbird Serenity LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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Regardless Of What Challenge You Are Facing…

“Regardless of what challenge you are facing right now, know that it has not come to stay. It has come to pass. During these times, do what you can with what you have, and ask for help if needed. Most importantly — never surrender. Put things in perspective. Take care of yourself. Find ways to replenish your energy, strengthen your faith, and fortify yourself from the inside out. There is a power in you that is stronger than anything that you are facing. Go within…tap into this power. Know that you will find courage, strength, and resolve to go through any valley experiences. You have something special. You have GREATNESS within you!” —Les Brown