Screaming Pain

I am in the midst of a heat wave induced flare-up, especially with stormy weather approaching. The same pain which started up for me last May has resurfaced. I went from a four to a, “Please let me die in peace.” level of pain today, which no one should be forced to endure. There’s only so much medical abandonment people can take before they completely lose their minds.

I haven’t completed two articles for this site because I am legitimately too angry to write. Not passing anger, as in, “I just need a few weeks to calm down.”, but pure, unadulterated RAGE, and it’s getting worse. If anyone has to ask why, then they haven’ been paying attention to anything going on in the world. Privilege is when you ignore everything you think does not effect you. Read that again.

I pray July will bring blessings, prosperity, and calm to all. Some of us need a break from the daily influx, and others will forge ahead, no matter what. I fall somewhere in between the two.

I hope to be back here in full-force soon, but in the meantime, I hope everyone is all right.

Be well,

The Psychological Impact Of Having To Ask For Help

I think this is so important for people to read and understand. Last weekend I was asked why I was pushing myself so hard. Here’s the answer: No one else knows precisely how I do things, and no one else knows how difficult it is for me to get these things done. They don’t have to live with my pain for a second. I’d prefer to blame myself, and only myself, if there is a missing item or a mistake made (I made a big mistake a few weeks ago and had to return two items that I would normally NEVER screw up, but all it took for me was stress, distraction, and a single moment of feeling overwhelmed.).

I may have horrible days, like today, when I did have to ask for help, but there are many 10+ pain level days when I force myself to grocery shop and run errands because no one else will ever be as thorough as I am. Yes, it bothers me, but I don’t have much choice. When I DO ask for help, people act like I just asked for ten million dollars, so I don’t accept help any more unless someone offers and I feel the offer is genuine.


Chronic Fatigue Is Not Just Me ‘Being a Teenager’

A friend of mine mentioned that her daughter was experiencing a lot of the early signs of Fibromyalgia, but no doctor had diagnosed her with it yet. Aches, pains, migraines, dizziness, exhaustion. It was like hearing someone talk about me at the same age. So, I share this for concerned parents that worry that their children aren’t being heard.