Patient X is being released into my care this evening after major surgery at the beginning of the month. Discharge was repeatedly delayed by post-op illness and absolute idiocy on the part of doctors arguing over proper procedure. It took them nearly a week to discover that he had not one, but two separate infections. … Continue reading Patient X
Pieces Of Me
Situation Or Depression? There’s A Difference
I had a major meltdown Monday. I can't recall the last time I felt that alone, that isolated from my friends & family, or that upset. I'm certain it's happened before, but Monday was simply too much, too soon, and way too intensely upsetting. I vividly remember scrolling through my contacts list at one point, … Continue reading Situation Or Depression? There’s A Difference
Silence, Leaf Blowers, & Sunday Dinner
Waking up this morning, I had a plan. Thus far, that plan is at a standstill as I am still dealing with yesterday's migraine. In turn, all I wanted was silence, in all its perfect glory. This, of course, is where the leaf blowers come in, and threaten to make me sicker. After doing some mundane … Continue reading Silence, Leaf Blowers, & Sunday Dinner
Morphine Mania
It's no secret; I've had a rough two weeks dealing with a serious family emergency. If you've ever had to force a man (or any loved one) to go the hospital knowing that something was clearly NOT "okay", perhaps you can relate. My brother came out of surgery Thursday afternoon, a good three hours earlier … Continue reading Morphine Mania
Fog
When I went to bed this morning, the fog was pretty dense behind my house. It rolled in out of nowhere. I think it's a metaphor for what I am going through at the moment. "It happened out of nowhere." Yeah, that sounds about right. I feel nothing. I'm an ocean-cleansed shell. For almost two … Continue reading Fog
Sleep Deprived
I spent Sunday running on less than three hours of sleep. As you can imagine, it was an incredibly long day. I pushed myself to go to the hospital. I was surprised I wasn't in and out in twenty minutes, as hospitals are more than a little traumatic for me. I managed to stay for quite … Continue reading Sleep Deprived
Hanging By A Very Fine Thread
I think what little is left of my sanity snapped Thursday afternoon when I received word that my brother will likely need open heart surgery, providing he is a viable candidate. If that is not an option, he will require a heart transplant. These are the kinds of words that make you want to sink … Continue reading Hanging By A Very Fine Thread
Family First
Yesterday morning my brother was admitted into the hospital with what is, as of now, a form of heart failure. The doctors are baffled; stating that they don't know how this happened because he is far too young. Unfortunately, he is far from being out of the woods. He is scheduled for a serious procedure … Continue reading Family First
Prayers & Tears
I contemplated being silent today because I'm not in a good mood, but I'm also too upset to pretend. I've had less than five hours of sleep. I tried going back to bed an hour ago, but I am unable to focus on genuine rest. That usually means doing what I always do when there … Continue reading Prayers & Tears
Morning “Rituals” & Fibromyalgia
I'm sure most people have their morning "rituals". For most people, it means waking up in search of coffee or tea. It involves the most basic of things until we know with certainty where we're going (Work, school, the grocery store, etc.). I had a solid idea of how today would go, but instead of … Continue reading Morning “Rituals” & Fibromyalgia
