This is quite unfortunate, really. 😦
Humor
The Worst Part Of Success
“The worst part of success is trying to find someone who is happy for you.” ―Bette Midler
Unamused
I find myself completely unamused, despite thinking this is a good one for today. In the past two days, I have gotten maybe eight hours of sleep. How am I still functioning?!
Felines Of New York
This should lighten the mood for many of you. I was once asked why I went to North Shore Animal League to adopt two kittens when I could have gone someplace local. My response was “I’m from New York. I want cats with attitude.” 😉 Of course, as I speak, there’s more attitude in my house than necessary. People talk about certain types of cats having more personality or attitude than others, and they’re right. However, I would not trade that in for anything.
Earl Grey Snow Day
Hello everyone! I was terribly sick yesterday, so I apologize for not posting. Happy Purim & Happy Full Crow Moon. Believe me when I say, I won’t be able to see the moon tonight. The snow blind is murderous and the sky is so white, it’s creepy.
I’m recovering from a series of migraines that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. Anyone who is lucky enough to have their migraines get better as they get older is truly blessed. I have doubts mine will cease completely without the use of a sledgehammer. Thankfully, three rounds of medication and my blood pressure lowering seems to have helped considerably. And yet, I’m too smart to fully trust that because they’re evil. Migraine sufferers know what I’m talking about.
Today is one of those snow days where the roads are so bad, all you can really do is shovel, get out the snowblower, and drink hot beverages while reading, working, or watching TV/listening to music. Earlier I discovered that my next door neighbor (I’ve mentioned them before. Everyone agreed that she’s an absolute psycho. Today, I strongly suspect her husband is off his rocker as well.) took it upon himself to “borrow” my snowblower. I wasn’t asked, so imagine the expression on my face when I saw him outside with a snowblower he doesn’t even know how to use. That thing cost me a LOT of money several years ago, so if he breaks it, I expect an immediate delivery of the purchase price because I truly don’t think what he did was cool. Who does that?! If you ask me, we’re fine, but if you help yourself, I take issue with it. I’m much more apt to help a person than they are, but I also don’t use someone else’s property or tools without asking. If it wasn’t snowing heavily, I might have gone outside and said something, but right now the point is moot. Suffice it to say, I am annoyed. When did manners go out of style?!
What did I learn about myself this morning? That I’m raising a disrespectful, unappreciative, rude cat. Sassy McSasserson (No, that’s not her real name.) bunny kicked me in the head when I gave her hugs and kisses to comfort her because snow is scary to her and she doesn’t like to see it. She spent a few hours trying to attack it as it fell, before getting bored. When I went to brush her later on (because she’d shedding almost as much hair as I do on a daily basis, perhaps more), she bit me, claws came out, and there was blood. I was NOT pleased. Now she’s under my bed attacking her sister, simply for existing. I am happy to say that Mini (Also, not her real name.) has emerged unscathed. As the smaller, younger of the two, she is normally the aggressor, but today she is far more interested in learning how to truly meow and steal all of my pens in systematic fashion, when not standing up at her full height to “attack” the birds that are trying to build their nests for Spring. How she expects to do that through glass, I do not know, but hey, you’ve got to let them figure this shit out on their own. Of course, if you’re me, you do so while responding to all said chirps and meows, so that they know you speak their language. It’s a great way to ensure that you don’t get returned to the shelter as the “inappropriate human”. I’ve caught Sassy over the past year or so staring at me and I suspect that Ms. Goldeneyes has been contemplating trading me in for a newer, fancier model. Feed, love, groom, keep them safe, make sure they’re healthy. If she thinks she can do better, I have news for her; they just don’t make them like me any more. Not only did they break the mold, but they beat the hell out of the mold maker too. (Yes, this used to make my mother laugh.) Shout out to Shay for that hilarious birthday card of old. This is the first time in a long time that it made me smile.
What else do I have to say? I’m not sure. It’s really just random silliness. Well, the last bit was, the rest was absolute seriousness.
Perhaps I should have another cup of tea. It’s decaf Earl Grey, but it’s my newest tea addiction.
copyright © 2015 by Lisa Marino & Blackbird Serenity LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
Conversations In My House: Part One
Conversations In My House: Part One
This is an actual conversation I had, verbatim, yesterday morning.
Him: “I’m out of body wash?”
Me: “If the bottle isn’t there, then yes, it would appear so.”
Him: “You didn’t think to replace it?”
Me: <left eyebrow raised> “Do I LOOK like your mother?”
Him: “No. Do you have something I can use for today?”
Me: “I’m sure there’s something in there. In fact, I know there’s plenty in there.”
Him: “Yeah, but they all smell…girly.”
Me: “They rinse clean, just fucking use it.”
Him: “Don’t you have a bar of regular soap?”
Me: “I’m a woman, I use body wash.”
This incites grumbling.
Halfway through the shower I hear this,
Him: “There’s nothing left in this bottle.” (There’s a good three squeezes left in there. I have it upside down right now. 24 ounces is 24 ounces and the bottle is see-thru, I’m not an idiot.)
Me: “It was plenty for an entire shower less than five minutes ago.”
Him: “But now it’s empty.” (There was whining and sighing, it was ridiculous.)
Me: “Here, use this.”
Him: “What does it smell like?”
Me: “It smells fine, just use it. Rinse the shower thoroughly when you’re done so it doesn’t stain. Sometimes this one stains.”
Him: alarmed “Wait, what?! Why will it stain? What IS it?”
I’d already walked out.
Him: “Seriously, what IS this stuff? I’m going to smell like a giant Hershey’s Kiss!”
Philosophy Chocolate Covered Cherry, for the win!
Him, before he shaves and gets dressed: “Be honest. I smell like chocolate, right?”
Lesson to be learned: Don’t be a douche-bag if you want the fancy unisex stuff. Moreover, you’re an adult. Buy your own damn soap!
copyright © 2015 by Lisa Marino & Blackbird Serenity LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
The Four Letter Word Of Winter
S-N-O-W.
The original forecast was for “a little snow” this coming Wednesday. However, yesterday afternoon this somehow changed and now up to two feet is supposed to take a dump on my local area. I’m thrilled in all sorts of ways. <rolls eyes>
This is the last thing I want to be dealing with, but I’ve already put one person on snowblowing detail (Men have to earn their keep around here. LOL.) and out of the kindness of my heart, I also gave him a shovel. I’ll make him hot beverages as needed.
So, as the snow begins to stick North of Philadelphia, I’m taking my migraine and I to bed. I’ve lost my ability to get worked up over things outside my realm of control.
Let it snow.
Everyone in the path of this storm, stay off the roads once dangerous and stay warm. Be safe.
If you don’t hear from me for a few days, I decided to lay out in the snow and see how quickly it would be before someone noticed I was missing or found me.
My Goal This Weekend
In all seriousness, being sick made this a long, drawn out week. It was only made better by lots of fluids, rest, and soup. I am nothing if not serious about soup. Unfortunately, whatever this virus is, it lulled me into a false sense of security because it’s a sadistic bastard. I was fine for a day or two, and then it came back stronger and took me out. I lost an entire day of work because I desperately needed medicine and rest. I’m taking a less powerful dose of the medicine now, but I am still achy and not feeling like myself, plus the medicine is working on my lungs big time. Quite frankly, I did not know they were so deeply involved. It’s disgusting, really. Moreover, should this be making my kidneys feels like they’re going to run off and leave me? I’m certain the answer is “No.”
“Starve a fever, feed a cold.” is not nonsense, it’s true. My appetite hasn’t once been off. Obviously, I can’t eat certain things at the moment, but everything I can eat is making a difference, or at least that’s what I am being led to believe.
All things taken into consideration, I think I was a rock star this week. Sick as a dog, but under deadline, I completed the big manuscript yesterday afternoon ahead of schedule. Unlike the previously aforementioned asshole client I alluded to days ago, this one was incredibly respectful and immediately gave me professional feedback. I address issues right away, I don’t slip them into something serious nearly two full months after the fact. Yes, it still pisses me off.
I have two additional, albeit smaller, manuscripts to get through by Friday and then another client would like me to take a look at a couple of chapters. Both of them are aware that I am sick and both of them told me “No rush at all, there’s no deadline for this.” In all fairness, that probably only makes me work harder because I take my contracts seriously. I’ll do my best, but I might give myself part of this weekend to stay in bed and (possibly) watch season 3 of Sons of Anarchy. Approximately thirteen hours of Charlie Hunnam… It’s all part of the healing process, folks. (That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!)
I’m tired, achy, unpleasant, and seriously contemplating breakfast. How badly do I want it? How much work is truly involved, and do I REALLY want to eat? The truth is, I’m hungry and I do want to eat, but knowing this involves some work on my part means I’m not running to the kitchen just yet.
Also, I am beyond saddened to learn that I will be unable to donate bone marrow because of the Fibromyalgia. I didn’t talk about this when I first found out earlier in the week because I was very upset and found myself in tears. One of my neighbors has been stricken with cancer. My first thought was “I can donate blood and get tested to see if I’m a match to donate bone marrow.” I lost my father to cancer when he was 63. He bravely battled various forms of cancer for 15 years before it took his life. I’ve lost many key family members to cancer, and hearing about this makes me ill to the core. I don’t feel that my neighbors’ children deserve to lose their father so young (I was both young enough, but still adult enough to handle it to the best of my ability without self-destructing.), so I am determined to do whatever I can to help. After days of research, I found out this morning that Fibro patients cannot donate at all. My brother CAN be tested and is more than willing to donate, but since I cannot, and feel like shit for it, the organization has suggested I put together a registry drive in my area to help bring about awareness and possibly save some lives. I will speak with them about this next week. I’m very upset that this is all that I can personally do, but I believe something MUST be done, so I am taking the initiative. If you live in the Northeast Philadelphia area, maybe you can volunteer or come out to the drive and get tested. I will provide a date and time as soon as I know more.
And now, back to your regularly scheduled Saturday. I hope everyone has a good one.
copyright © 2015 by Lisa Marino & Blackbird Serenity LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
Morning Humor
A close friend sent this to me this morning and I cracked up.
Last night was, officially, the first night of Chanukah. I use the spelling I was raised with and I don’t like any other spelling because they all look wrong to me.
Alas, it was a long day and I might upload some photos of the feast I prepared, but if I don’t, I really don’t think anyone will care.
Written by LISA MARINO-Molchanova 