Speaker Of Powerful Words

“Speaker Of Powerful Words” was recently added to my professional bio. It makes me laugh because I don’t always realize how much power I put into the words I use. If you heard how I say things in my everyday life, you’d quickly learn it’s not any different from how I apply my voice to the written word.

One of the things I like about myself the most is that I don’t have dual-personalities. The way I write is the same way I speak in every format possible. Be it e-mail, letters, text messages, phone calls; I remain the same. It’s one of the things my closest friends have pointed out to me, and it’s one of the things they most love and respect about me.

Not everyone can handle unadulterated honesty or unfiltered realness. I, occasionally, struggle with the things people say to me when they are said with malice, disrespect, or a severe lack of clarity. 95% of the time, I wouldn’t say something with malicious intent to someone I care about. The tiny back-end percentage would be higher, but you haven’t met my extended family. I’d believe I was adopted if I didn’t know with absolute certainty that I wasn’t. I used to dream of being rescued by my “real parents” for many years, but now I know that the only person who can rescue me is…me.

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Words do have incredible power. It’s important to use your words wisely, even if, on occasion, it turns you into a hypocrite. No one is perfect and there are often moments in life where we don’t always practice what we preach, or follow the path we’ve personally suggested.

People often come to me with problems. They require advice and they need a trusted ear. I almost always find that they’re struggling between logic and intuition. As someone who lives an intuitive based life, I struggle with their issues because no matter what I say, they desperately want to see the good in the behavior of others, even when they’re being hurt and disrespected, or worse. I don’t care what other people may think: Good does not reside in the heart and soul of every single person in this world. Hell, jails are full of rapists, murderers, and all sorts of living proof, but it clearly bears repeating. Not everyone is good, not everyone has good intentions, and not everyone is 100% genuine. It’s sad, but it’s a fact.

In life, I take everything and everyone on a case-by-case basis. I can be a really nice person (No, I’m not kidding. Get to know me.), but if I’m shown the ugliest side of someone, the niceness goes away in 0.1 seconds. If you throw the “bitch card’ at me, you’re showing me an ugly side that isn’t something I respect. If you break it out once and I never see it again, I move on, the relationship continues in whatever form it resides in, but I will NEVER forget that I saw it. There’s a reason Scorpio is attached to my on-line profile, it’s not just my astrological sign; I can and will see through your bullshit. I have the power to sting, and I’m incredibly self-aware. I cannot unhear or unsee red flags, whatever they may be. I attribute that to being intuitive and living my life based on sensory perception.

I don’t understand people who will spit on you and tell you it’s raining. I don’t understand passive-aggressive people who turn the tiniest comment into the issue of the century. Far too many people struggle with difference of opinion. It’s their way or the highway. Unfortunately, they don’t understand that life is full of grey area. I’m a person of extremes, but I spend a lot of time in the grey, so I understand it maybe too well. I am baffled by people who refuse to expand their own minds and learn. How else do you grow? The stagnant life is pitiful indeed.

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Whenever I see “Speaker Of Powerful Words” on my bio, I feel as though it comes with immense responsibility. People talk a lot about athletes being role models for our children, but WE should be role models for our children and our children’s children. We should be the teachers who inspire them with words and actions to be better people. There is an exceptionally long list of ways to go about that.

I believe it’s important not to treat children like babies and talk to them like they’re morons. By all means, allow them to have their childhood, but do not be afraid to tackle the tough stuff. Uninformed children, or children that spend their entire lives being lied to by their parents, become insecure and completely unsure of themselves with age. They lack much-needed self-confidence. I have seen this carry over into adulthood, so please, avoid the bullshit and be real.

No one ever spoke “baby talk” to me, so when I started speaking, I spoke in full sentences. That was one of the ways I knew that adults took me seriously. I wasn’t encouraged to be the “next President of the United States” (who the hell would want that job?! No one sane!), but all of my talents were fostered.

My athletic ability was not ignored. I spent a huge chunk of my life as a gymnast, starting at age 4. Later on when my voice teacher called my mother and told her that I could sing, really sing, and that she wanted to tutor me privately, I got voice lessons. To this day, I still sing.

When my writing ability became my voice, it was not ignored. I was enrolled in a performing arts school at the time because of my singing, but every English, History, and Science teacher was completely blown away by me. I have incredibly fond memories of them and how encouraging they were of me. They all wanted me to move on and shine.

When I moved on to major in journalism and creative writing, that’s when I came upon my first real critic. When a professor tells you you’re “ruining the class” because of what you write and tells you he will continue to fail you until you drop the class, you can either keep going or you can laugh. I did both. He’d belittle me three times a week and I’d go home laughing because I was being published for thinking outside the box. In a room full of roughly 30 of the best writers in that part of New York City at the time, he singled me out constantly. Nothing I wrote was ever “good enough”. It only made me better. It gave me incredible vision for the future.

The years have come and gone and I have yet to meet someone who agrees with him. And if I did…I’d laugh.

I may not be everyone’s cup of coffee or tea, and that is perfectly acceptable to me, but at the end of each day, I am a speaker of powerful words. I salute you for reading my work and clicking LIKE.

Enjoy the updated bio and by all means, feel free to follow me on Twitter. Anyone that would also like to connect with me on Facebook can message me.

Thank you to #ChiropracticDaily for featuring my second article on migraines. It is most appreciated.

copyright © 2015 by Lisa Marino & Blackbird Serenity LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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If You Are To Be A Healer…

“If you are to be a healer you must understand that the biggest difficulty facing people with a problem is rarely the problem itself, but the fear that nobody else understands it. If nobody else understands it, the prospect of finding a solution can seem very dim. That is why the feeling of not being understood leads to desperation. And, conversely, the feeling that someone else understands moves people back from the brink and opens the door to discussion.” -Neale Donald Walsch

Migraines: Part II

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As a follow-up to part one, many migraine sufferers know that we have to be careful of what we eat. Sometimes it plays a role in whether or not we are triggering a migraine, and many people experience cravings days in advance of an actual episode, so it’s often hard to pinpoint the more difficult triggers. (On occasion I’ll have a major sugar craving 2-3 days before a massive attack. Other times they come barreling towards me without any warning.)

There are many external factors as well. Avoiding loud noises, bright lights, strong odors, extreme temperatures, etc., but there is also the underlying dietary concerns for many. Not all of these will apply to you, many do not apply to me, but it’s definitely good information to have.

Potential Food & Drink Triggers Include But Are Not Limited To: Chocolate, ice-cold foods, aged cheese (Blue, Swiss, Brie, Cheddar, Gorgonzola, Muenster, Smoked Provolone, Parmesan, Feta, Stilton, Mozzarella, and all processed cheeses.), pickles, soy sauce, certain types of red wine & saki, certain types of beer, citrus fruits, ripe bananas, kiwi, raspberries, red plums, papaya, pineapple, dried fruit (figs, raisins, dates, & apricots), tofu, processed soy (like a lot of veggie burgers), eggs, garlic, onions, olives, beans (broad, fava, pinto, lima, & garbanzo), cultured dairy products (yogurt, sour cream, buttermilk, etc.), peanuts, peanut butter, pizza, potato chips, chicken livers and other organ meats, smoked or dried fish, Sourdough bread, freshly baked yeast goods (donuts, cakes, homemade bread, & rolls), crackers, soups made from meat extracts or bouillon (homemade broth is different), aspartame and other artificial sweeteners, caffeine found in chocolate, cocoa, coffee, tea, colas, beverages like Mountain Dew, and certain medications.

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This is precisely what woke me up this morning.

Some of these were new for me, and some were things I’ve known forever about myself. I’ll go down the list.

Milk chocolate is a problem for me at times. White chocolate isn’t real chocolate, it is pure fat. I eat dark chocolate almost exclusively. A small amount (often less than an ounce) curbs my cravings. I’ve found that dark chocolate with chili peppers helps alleviate a migraine at times. You can normally find this particular type of chocolate in the candy section of every store. A single bar is about $2. It’s nowhere near as spicy as you might think. In fact, the chili pepper in the chocolate is subtle.

Cheese wise I’m pretty strange. I eliminated cow’s milk from my diet five years ago. I only buy Coconut milk or Almond milk (Vanilla flavored on both. Also, there is an AMAZING Dark Chocolate Almond milk that I have a hard time keeping in my fridge. It’s a great mid-day snack, but is also awesome first thing in the morning.). You won’t find me buying or using milk or cream unless a recipe calls for it and I cannot substitute. With certain things, substitution is downright evil. I hate fake sugar and I hate fake butter. I’m part Italian and I’m almost never without mozzarella cheese. I would take it with me to a deserted island, I love it. I have threatened to cut people’s fingers off if they steal it out of my fridge, I take it seriously. Mozzarella has very simple ingredients in it (less than four), so whether you prefer whole milk or part skim, you should be fine. Don’t bother with the Fat Free version, it’s disgusting beyond words. Who wants to eat grey rubber?

I grew up with a real love for pickles and even though I’m not supposed to eat them, I can’t resist a good Sour Pickle. They trigger a migraine once in a while, but I don’t eat them often enough for it to be a real issue. I wouldn’t eat them at all if they were any kind of consistent problem. Regular pickles don’t bother me, but sometimes 30 minutes later, I’m sick. I’m never 100% sure if regular ones will get me or not, but since they’re not a constant in my life, I let it slide.

I never eat ripe bananas, that’s a rule of mine. I like them when they’re still a little green (the first day I’ve bought them or within two days before they start to turn really yellow) and that seems to avoid the chemical in them that can trigger migraines. Kiwi, pineapple, plums, raspberries, and papaya don’t affect me either. I’m a big fruit person, but I tend to stick to strawberries, blueberries, avocado, cantaloupe, peaches, and watermelon. I find that buying precisely what’s in season works well for me. Of late, I’ve been craving apples and since I stopped eating them years ago, I don’t make a big issue out of having the occasional apple because I know it’s not a trigger. Citrus fruit sometimes gets me, but it’s usually oranges or grapefruit.

Eggs, garlic, and onions are three of the worst offenders because of their high sulfur content. I love to cook, and garlic and onions are in so many of the starting ingredients to a lot of what I make, so I have to be careful and reduce the amounts I use at times. If I use fresh garlic I don’t eat it in the finished product, which helps eliminate the issue for me because sliced, cooked garlic will make me really sick. I choose Vidalia onions for most recipes because they’re naturally sweeter and don’t tend to affect me as much as yellow, Spanish, and white onions do. Red onions don’t affect me much either, but onions can still sneak up on me at times, so I have to be careful when I’m making salads or stir-frying vegetables. My life has gotten a lot healthier since I increased my spinach and kale intake. If you can incorporate these veggies into your diet without any fuss, it will help detox a lot of the negative things that cause migraines.

I love hummus, it borders on obsession, so clearly garbanzo beans don’t bother me. I have started to get sick from certain things that aren’t on this list, but sometimes it’s hard to decide if something is genuine food allergy, an intolerance, or something triggering headaches.

I used to eat tofu at least once a week. Sometimes it would make me sick and other times it wouldn’t. Processed soy can trigger a migraine for me, fresh tofu is different, but can still pose a problem for some.

Under normal circumstances I try only to drink water, seltzer, iced green tea, or iced herbal teas. I’ve got a slight addiction to Diet Cherry Dr. Pepper, but a 12-20 ounce cup once a day (on occasion) that is mostly ice and rarely ever gets finished is not the issue. If I drank it every single day, all day long, I’d be jumping off the walls from the caffeine. I know people who do that (it takes me forever to finish a 2 liter bottle) and they get headaches from the lack of caffeine, so it becomes a vicious cycle.

Artificial sweetener is a slippery slope. As I previously stated, I hate fake sugar. This time of year I become a bit obsessed with lemonade, but I find that regular lemonade is way too sweet, even with a lot of ice, even if I make it myself. Several years ago I decided to start using the “On The Go” packs from Crystal Light in Pink Lemonade or Raspberry Lemonade. Yes, it’s got sweetener in it, but for some reason, I’m numb to it, so long as it’s one of these two lemonades. I’d gotten a bunch of them with a water bottle I purchased for Breast Cancer Awareness one year. When I opened the sealed bottle, it was full of pink drink packets from Crystal Light. I set them aside, but one day I got desperate to drink something that wasn’t plain, and now I’m hooked. It increases my water intake, but on occasion, too much sweetener is way too much for me. It’s in almost all diet sodas, so if it’s a trigger for you, go on Pinterest and learn how to make your own flavor infused water. I’m a big fan of Decaf Mint Green Tea. Twinings has an awesome one, you just throw the tea bags into a water pitcher and within a few hours, you’ve got really good tea. On top of being refreshing, it’s completely sugar-free and doesn’t require a sweetener unless you choose to add it. Plus, it’s easy to tote along in a BPA free bottle wherever you go. I fill my bottle with ice and tea and even on a really hot day, it’s amazingly hydrating. I go through a pitcher a day, sometimes two. It’s that good.

Red wine is a mixed bag. I almost always order/buy Merlot. I aim for the fruitier ones as they don’t tend to bother me, aside from making me sleepy. Sometimes I do a lot better with a mixed drink as opposed to wine, but it all depends on my mood. White wine also contains sulfites, so it is just as likely to give you (or me) a migraine as red wine.

Most of the other things on the list are things I don’t eat at all, or rarely eat.

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I think it’s important to pay attention to preservatives. If you can’t pronounce what’s in your food, you might want to avoid it. TBHQ is one that scares me a bit. It is being studied to find out if it causes stomach tumors. Some studies say it does, others say it inhibits the growth of stomach cancer completely. Either way, it’s cause for concern. I only recently realized it was in some of the things I buy. It’s more commonly used on dog food and both the EU and FDA have decided it is safe for human consumption. It’s your body, you be the judge.

Some people believe that going gluten-free will help eliminate some, if not all, of their migraines. I tried it for a period of time, along with several months of vegetarian bordering on vegan. It didn’t help me, it drove me insane, so do what works best for your body and overall health. Consult with a doctor before attempting a gluten-free diet. Many recommend you only go gluten-free is you have a genuine intolerance or Celiac disease, saying that it will not do anything for you if you don’t have one or the other. There’s a big difference between the two.

In the end, we are all different. It is extremely important for each of us to know our bodies and know that works for us. What triggers a migraine for you may not be an issue for me, but the second you become a migraine sufferer, it is extremely important that you find out what food and drink items have to be eliminated from your diet. Initially I cut everything out and slowly worked an item back into my diet here and there, and that worked for me, so I highly recommend that route for others. If one item affects you, eliminate it and move on to the next. See what helps and hinders, it will help you make the best choices for yourself.

The next part of this piece will talk about various herbs, essential oils, and a few treatments that some consider radical, but are bringing immense relief to others. Relief is the ultimate dream when you suffer from migraines, and many people will do anything to achieve that goal.

If you have any info you’d like to share or pass along to me, feel free to send me a message or leave a comment. 🙂

copyright © 2013-2015 by Lisa Marino & Blackbird Serenity LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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Many sufferers experience all of these or 2-3. Just one is too many, if you ask me.