Things That Irritate Me

chanukah1

If one more person wishes me a “Merry Christmas”, I will hurt them. It’s very simple; I’m JEWISH. I feel like I’ve been over this a million times, but today I damn near lost my temper, so I’m going to reiterate this, but for the love of G-d, don’t make me do it twice.

Yes, believe it or not, there are religions that do not celebrate the same holidays that you may celebrate. There are religions that are much older. This is basic kindergarten knowledge, yet every single person I’ve come across for over a month now has made an assumption I don’t fucking like. I’ve spent weeks holding it in. I’ve been polite, I’ve been nondescript in my “Enjoy your holiday!” greetings to others, I sent out cards with genuine, handwritten messages to express how I feel about people in a loving fashion, but at this point, I’m just plain fed up.

Tonight just so happens to be the first night of Chanukah. So, while the Jews are celebrating the miracle of oil lasting for eight nights and surviving taking back our temple centuries ago (By the way, we’re still surviving and we are a religious minority.), and we do this in very individual ways, there is literally zero discussion among us of trees, lights on our homes, Santa, Jesus, etc. To learn more, here’s some info that you might find prudent in case you consider wishing me a “Merry Christmas” ever again: CHANUKAH

It’s one thing if you don’t know I’m Jewish, but I make myself pretty clear. I openly discuss Jewish holidays, Israel, traditions, etc. I am also Wiccan, and I openly discuss those holidays, too. But if you go through my feed, you will see zero mention of holidays pertaining to any other faith. There’s a valid reason for that, and to ensure I don’t insult anyone, I’ll keep my feelings to myself.

I will always be respectful of those who show me respect and kindness, but damn, I am SO tired of correcting people. I know they mean well, really, but it drives me insane, so I’m putting my foot down. You can call me names (I’m sure plenty of people will.), but ultimately, respect the simple fact that I don’t celebrate Christmas. Wish me a Happy Chanukah (there are many different spellings out there, so it’s easy to confuse one with another) with the same genuineness as “Merry Christmas”. The big difference between your religion and mine is that Jews don’t believe in Jesus. There are other things we don’t believe as well, but that’s really the major one. There’s no lack of faith in G-d, we believe, just differently than you do. Also, we don’t go around trying to convert you. We’re pretty “live and let live”.

So tonight, I’d like to thank the people who honored me with cards & gifts. I genuinely appreciate the generosity and love.

Here’s hoping I never have to mention this again, because if I do, I’m re-posting an article I wrote a few years ago about what I do on Christmas Day. Frankly, I might post it tomorrow for shits and giggles.

To everyone celebrating whatever they believe in tonight; may peace and love be at the core of all you do. Blessed Be.

Into The Flame

In attempting to establish this beautiful new blog, I realize that my writing style has changed a bit from all those years ago. I haven’t changed, the core of who I am has made some adjustments, but with my writing, I’ve simply polished the diamond.

The bio for this blog is pretty simple, but I like it that way. It gives you, the reader, the opportunity to get to know me from one post to the next. So, in keeping with that “get to know you” phase, I thought I’d elaborate a bit on the difference between enjoying sharing your thoughts via the written word and being an experienced writer. Two very different beasts indeed.

It galls me at times when people ask what I do. I can tell you for a fact that I could care less what another person does professionally, so long as they’re a decent person and they treat me with respect. I’m not sure when relationships and friendships all became a fucking job interview. I blame Facebook. People are always trying to impress one another with their professions, the vacations they take, family photos, the houses they purchase, the parties they throw, the cars they drive, etc. And we wonder why there is STILL a mortgage crisis? We wonder WHY people are losing their jobs, their homes, their health?!? It’s because no one has any priorities, they are all too fucking busy with their smart-phones in their faces checking Facebook statuses. I have seen this in every professional setting I have encountered. I have seen this in every doctor’s office I have been in. Hell, I’ve seen this in hospital waiting rooms! It’s fucking ridiculous, and obviously, a major pet peeve of mine.

Last week, a person asked me what I do, and I said what I always say “I’m a writer.” I did not elaborate any further. I think it’s pretty self-explanatory, for the most part. And yet, they were immediately impressed. I have no idea why, because often times, being a writer means struggling and suffering for your art. And make no mistake, any writer of real quality IS an artist. Some people think that by having a blog where they post jumbled words, or random thoughts, it automatically makes them a writer. It doesn’t, but before you jump down my throat, allow me to explain. (And no, I am not insulting anyone. You’ll certainly know it when I do. I have no qualms and will call anyone out on their bullshit.)

I am a writer because it’s God given ability. I come from a long line of great communicators of the written word. We all tend to speak the exact same way we write. My parents, God Rest & Bless Their Souls, were both gifted writers, but not by trade. My Grandfather was an amazing writer, again, not by trade. My Aunt has had a lot of her work published, and she is also not a writer by trade.

I knew very early on that 1) I’d never work a 9-5 job that I’d hate, 2) That I was a creative type, and always would be, and 3) That I would NEVER answer to anyone. In turn, people have always published my work unedited.

I had to put my foot down the first time a person cut my work to shreds and published it without first running it past me. I told him “Do you REALLY think you’re qualified to do that? You destroyed the entire piece!” The rage I felt was unreal. He mulled it over and came to a decision: He didn’t think he was qualified, and he never did it again. He, and everyone thereafter, was afraid to touch what I’d worked so hard on. They decided they had to accept it “as is”, and the fact of the matter is, I knew exactly what I was doing by being a challenging pain in the ass. People stopped being concerned about space and started being more concerned about making sure I was a part of their projects.

That is precisely how “Poison In Lethal Doses” came to be the very special thing I have always considered it. Some of the first reviews I ever received said things like “She will say ANYTHING, beautifully spreading her words like poison from a wound.” or “Looking forward to the next dose of poison.” The original name was Black & Red Roses, and the material was thorny, pardon the pun. My words and reputation quickly solidified me as far from flowery. I then chose the new title, and kept going, always pushing boundaries. If anyone in that particular community disliked it, they simply did not have the power to stop me or shut me up.

I have always been more impressed with web-site and blog content, as opposed to design. I have seen some beautiful sites with horrible content. I have seen some stunning blogs that made me cringe when I saw the run on sentences, the lack of commas, improper sentence structure, poor grammar, and, on occasion, the particular style of writing. In this, I am a perfectionist. If I catch an error in my own work, or one slips past me, I will correct it as soon as I see it. Mistakes do happen, but the essence of the written word on anything I place my name on is going to be of quality. It is going to be real and done with a measure of finesse.

There are words I loathe, and there are things people do with words that makes me want to physically harm them. Some of which are, but are never limited to the following:

#1- Any version of ya’ll. I don’t care how it’s used or spelled, it is wrong. I LOVE being in Texas, but I cringe when people speak and use that word. It just plain drives me insane. If you live south of the Mason-Dixon line or you’re from the Midwest, don’t be offended that I said this, realize it’s a regional difference in how people speak.

#2- Anyone that cannot spell “all right”. It’s two words people, not one. English 101 teaches you this. Hell, elementary school English teaches you this basic fact!

#3- Improper grammar and not completing a word. Unless you’re a Platinum selling rapper, don’t write like one.

#4- Using the word “‘cause”. Unless there is cause to use the word, try using because. It makes you look a little more put together, even if you aren’t. It brings no character to your work whatsoever, unless, perhaps, it is character driven dialogue.

#5- Most slang words. Call me crazy, I do not find them charming.

Regional and cultural phrases sometimes bother me, but as a person with a prominent accent when tired or pissed off, this is one thing I tend to let slide. I’m educated enough to know what people mean, thank God and Goddess. I have accents all around me and I like it that way.

I am an immense fan of the written word. My own work, and the work of a great many others. I am a Bibliophile personified. I collect first edition hard-covers of books that I feel are amazing bodies of work. I am not a fan of anything considered to be “classic literature”, I have very specific reading tastes. In most cases, if it is considered “classic”, I have chosen not to read it. If you’re a “classics” fan, I assure you I’ve read things you’ve never even heard of.

I have a long list of authors whose work I follow religiously. My year starts out with a list of books I have to pre-order and another list of holds to place at my local library for books I want to read, but know I will never read twice. I re-read several different collections from a handful of authors at least twice a year, sometimes more if I have the time. It is not uncommon for me to write extensive book reviews on eBay, Amazon, Goodreads, or on “…..And The Moon Sees All”. I’ve simply reached a point where, on the other blog, I don’t feel my individual writing efforts are truly being appreciated, so I am bringing it all here. There will be fresh material and material you have never seen before. If it is new to your eyes and is enlightening or encourages you to think, then that’s what I intended for it to do.

My love of the written word also carries over to quotes, song lyrics, and movie scripts. I know the entire Harry Potter movie collection by heart, and I do all of the voices. My current cats’ middle name is “Firebolt”, need I say more? (And if you saw her run around, you’d find it apropos. Sometimes I have to see if hellhounds are chasing her butt. She’s a sneaky little ninja.)

I’ve been writing for a long time. When I began writing, I had no idea what I was doing. The advice gifted to me was this: “Write what you think and write what you feel, and if someone doesn’t like it, tough shit.” To this day, that makes me smile. My mother knew what she was doing, but she had no idea what she was going to create by encouraging my inner voice to become so much bigger and bolder. I realize that as a quiet, shy, introverted kid, she was giving me the tools to become someone strong who spoke her mind eloquently, and fiercely. On days when I don’t know what to say or think, I remember those words and remind myself that being myself is the very best gift I can give others with my work, and as a person.

Being a writer of quality takes time. It means writing a lot of things and throwing them out. It means that not everything you write is going to be fabulous. It means having notebooks full of things you’ve written, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Being a good writer requires a serious dose of keen observation of others and the world at large. It’s not all humor and anecdotes, and it’s not all rants and complaints. In this, we all bring something varied to the table on a blog. However, if you’re anything like me, I am betting the work that stands out the most is that which you know took dedicated time, care, devotion, and slivers of their soul.

For some people, writing is a hobby, or something they love to do, but for me, writing is part of who I am. It is ability and talent, and I don’t place a lot of ego into it, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t know what I am good at. When writing is topic based, I focus on the topic and my views. When it is character based, I slip into the skin of my characters and allow them to speak. Each day, I grow. Each platform affords me the opportunity to broaden my horizons and be this much better than I was the day before. It’s about honing artistic talent every single day of my life. Because for me, writing is my art.