Health

My Life Is Not an ‘Acceptable Loss’ During the COVID-19 Pandemic

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My Life Is Not an ‘Acceptable Loss’ During the COVID-19 Pandemic

I, too, have noticed what is most important to people. The shallow depths are obnoxious as hell. People are behaving as if this is suddenly over and life can go back to “normal”. Life is doing no such thing, and the sooner you come to terms with it, the better off you’ll be. The fact that people are now traveling to different countries by choice and going on vacations is a bit much for me. They aren’t wearing masks, gloves, or doing anything to protect themselves or those around them. And they’re taking great lengths to justify traveling with a newborn, and traveling in general. All of that to be at the beach? Really?! Perhaps I take it for granted because I am so close to the beach, but I’m not spending my time at a packed beach, park, or anywhere that involves crowds. It can wait, and it will.

I am at risk every time I pick up groceries in between Whole Foods and Amazon Fresh deliveries, which, let’s face it, is a privilege. Not everyone can have the bulk of their groceries delivered. It took me several months to even get a delivery slot. Once you have it, you’re good for future slots. I only have one complaint about my order, but that’s for Whole Foods to deal with. I am still going to places like Walgreens, PetSmart, and Trader Joe’s because they’re close by, and I still have medication and other things that I normally replace every few weeks. Trader Joe’s is doing the most to keep things clean, like sanitizing the shopping carts in front of you, and putting distancing labels on the floor so you can get what you need, get on line, and get out quickly. They’re still limiting how many shoppers are in the store at a time, so I don’t feel overwhelmed in there. PetSmart is predominantly empty. My cats still need supplies each month, so I do my best to make sure they have what they need.

I am usually a regular at my nail salon; rarely going as long as three weeks in between manicures. I worried they might not survive being closed for several months, yet I have not been back since they’ve reopened. I may not return until September or October. I’ve reached a new level of , “Who cares?” regarding my own nails because many regulars are over 70 and require people to socially distance. I would feel like an absolute  hypocrite if I went running in for an appointment immediately, as so many people did. I say this out of concern. One person I am semi-familiar with went running to her salon for a mani/pedi and two days later she had a staph infection. I trust my salon and I’m friendly with the owners. You will never see me post a photo of an infection asking people online what I should do about it. I would NEVER go back to a place that made me ill in any way,  and I would definitely report it to the owners, and to the board of health. Where there’s one staph infection, there are others. I will pass, for now. I can use foot masks temporarily until I feel safe enough to return to a “new normal”. It’s important to find out what they’ve done to make their customers, and themselves, safer. I know when I do call for an appointment, they will have answers for me. Yes, going in might make me feel better after the past four months of pure isolation, depression, pain, and misery, but at what cost?

My hair salon went out of business. I knew this was a strong possibility, especially when my colorist left a few years ago (Her new place of business was looted during a protest in Boston, so the owners don’t know if they can rebuild or not. This woman has been amazing to me from day one. She has guided me with maintaining a difficult hair color, got it sponsored for two straight years which saved me a fortune, responds to questions I have each month regarding what to use, especially when I am unsure about making it darker, richer, extremely vibrant, or lighter. We came to an agreement about lightening it up a bit for summer, in case I want to go back to my natural color in a few months.). I want to stay with the same stylist, but I have no idea where she will end up working or if she even feels safe to return to any environment involving hair right now. In the meantime, I found two alternative options and I am definitely going to get a significant trim as soon as possible, but I am doing so after reading all of the precautions put in place in order to protect their customers and employees. If your employees don’t feel safe, then the customer will pick up on that very quickly. Knowing that Ulta took care of their employees the entire time the stores were closed makes me much more willing to give them my business. The places that didn’t take care of their employees, well, it shows.

My point in all of this is that I am okay to run and get a much-needed hair cut, but I am not going to put myself or others at risk for something I view as frivolous. I wear a mask, I wear gloves, I carry hand sanitizer with me (I have actually done this for ten years. Mini sanitizers from Bath & Body Works are especially perfect for your purse. They are about to begin their semi-annual clearance sale, so if you don’t have a little one for even the shortest outings, theirs are fantastic and you can shop the sale online. Dr. Bronner’s has sprayable hand sanitizers, which are an excellent backup or first choice. I’m currently carrying one of theirs, along with a Warm Vanilla Sugar from B&BW. Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s are carrying Dr. B’s, and their website has them for direct purchase, as well.), etc. I wipe down everything that comes inside with Clorox wipes. I’m sure I look nuts when I’m doing this, but these are necessary precautions. Every little bit helps.

If you’re refusing to wear a mask, think about the possibility of you infecting those you love the most in life. Plenty of people are asymptomatic and don’t know they’re walking carriers, so every time they walk past someone who is already at risk, they can be making that person sick or leading them to their death. We aren’t being punished by being asked to wear a damn mask while in stores.

I am choosing to be smart this summer. I don’t have to go anywhere weekly, but I can get my hair cut and it’ll remain in good shape until Fall. In this, I feel like it’s all right, but if I had to go monthly, I don’t know if I’d take that risk seeing as how I will be going to someplace unfamiliar. And because there will only be one or two people there at the same time, it’s okay. There’s some distancing involved and I’ll still be wearing a mask. I’ll still be washing my hands and the stylist will be following specific protocols, as well. 

At my next essential doctor’s appointment in August, I very well might be the only person in the waiting room, and that is perfectly fine. It went well in May, and I know it will be fine moving forward. I’m not ready for crowds and I don’t think any doctor’s office is prepared for this, either.

I agree with nearly everything this writer mentioned. I have gone as far as refusing to discuss the virus with people because they’re obsessed and I am not. I would rather read a book, do some research, or write, than listen to people’s fears. Only one person took offense to my saying that I could not be a Covid 19 dumping ground. They took this personally and turned it into a fight. Via text. Did you just roll your eyes? Trust me, it gets worse and I will be discussing it, but I feel like many of us have had enough of the constant influx. I do NOT want to sit in front of any news coverage via television, online, or the radio. There’s a limit and I have met mine. There’s no point complaining about it because everyone is going to do whatever the hell they want. I want to continue to make the smartest choices possible. 

I’ll be here; keeping my distance and trying to maintain a sense of normalcy within my own day-to-day activities. I encourage everyone to do whatever makes them feel safe. We’ve never lived through something like this, so there’s an obvious learning curve, but it’s also a necessary one.

Wishing you all a healthy, safe 4th of July weekend.

Essential Appointments

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Today, I went to an essential appointment with my headache specialist. Not surprisingly, she acted like nothing ever happened via phone between us.

This month is my two year mark as one of her patients, and aside from a few appointments where she actually knew my name, and my medical reasons for seeing her, this time she changed my name entirely. Say hello to Mary, everyone. 😂 I’ve been called worse, really. 🙄

The waiting room was predominantly empty, and no one can hear you speak  clearly with a mask on, so I said, “I know you mean me, but that’s not my name.” I had to repeat myself three times. When she went into the system to double check, she wondered out loud, “How the hell did I come up with Mary?” Good question, but I was there for medical treatment, it was not a social call. She put a note in my chart to remember my name for when I go back in early August. 😒

I mostly said yes to her incessant questions. With strict Covid-19 precautions in place, “Yes.” seemed like a great answer to help speed up the 20-30 minute procedure. I was polite, I listened, but I was also astounded that she asked how my migraines have been these past few months, especially since we JUST had that conversation where I was basically begging for alternatives for when a treatment method fails and I’m left suffering. This plea was treated with disrespect and disdain. That sorry excuse for a conversation was not acceptable, but I learned from day one to discuss those matters during follow-up appointments only. Otherwise, she becomes mentally distracted. You do NOT want a doctor distracted when the treatment process requires one hundred and ten percent of someone’s concentration.

I already had a migraine going in to this appointment, so I immediately went to the only place open that serves coffee (I miss you, Starbucks. That’s sad, given the full weight of what’s going on in this world. But hey, I’m human. I love their Iced Green Tea Lemonade and their Passion Tango Lemonade Iced Tea. The former is caffeinated a bit, the latter is herbal. I have gift cards saved to their app. I wouldn’t normally go there, otherwise, but I digress.) for Cold Brew. I was craving it for four days straight. They were out of both versions, so I ordered iced coffee with a shot of vanilla instead. I then proceeded to try making it as light as possible, while adding the correct amount of sugar so it would be lightly sweet. Ordering coffee after noon on most days isn’t a good idea to begin with. I haven’t had coffee in almost a full two years. I gave it up cold turkey because my medication, at the time, required it. No problem. I can give up high dose caffeine. I know most people can’t, but it wasn’t a hardship. I was still drinking iced green tea on occasion once I got the hang of the medication, and when I was unable to find the decaffeinated version, I would still drink full strength Earl Grey on cold mornings (I use a huge mug and two tea bags. I take my tea pretty seriously.). Otherwise, I was drinking my usual water and iced herbal tea. Repetitive boredom, but we do what’s good for us. Or at least, I try my best to do so.

Turns out, I’m still finding coffee incredibly disgusting. Three sips and I was so nauseous, I contemplated whether or not I needed to take Promethazine. I wanted the caffeine to help my migraine, but right now, only ice cold Coke Zero or Pepsi does the trick. When either one tastes REALLY good to me, the caffeine will help considerably. Under normal circumstances, I don’t touch the stuff.

The artificial sweetener most widely used is a neurotoxin. It hasn’t been researched enough regarding the long-term effects on the human body. However, many people are often misdiagnosed with severe neurological or pain disorders when what they REALLY have is Aspartame poisoning. Too often, you aren’t asked about your diet or what you drink, other than alcohol, so I can only wonder how many people are drinking this stuff daily, in one form or another, and making their health worse. I’m pretty good about eliminating things and not looking back.

I cut all of these things out when I was first diagnosed with migraines. There’s a long list that you have to eliminate to see if they are triggers. You can slowly bring things back into your diet, providing they don’t make you sick. I have researched the fact that this sweetener causes insane amounts of inflammation in the body. Even twenty ounces can set you back if your body was trying to heal itself. Unfortunately, the sugar in the regular versions is way too much. I’m a purist; I will use real butter, heavy cream, real sugar, etc., when making specific things for myself, family, and friends. While my taste buds can easily tell good from bad, sometimes you’ll do anything for relief. That’s how bad my migraines have been.

Upon returning from my appointment, my head pain was moving into my neck and I was MISERABLE. I am used to this, sadly. I know it takes a few days or two weeks to start feeling better. Hopefully I can get there quickly because the pain turned into a full-blown flare up, and I can barely think straight. Sleep would be great, but isn’t likely to happen at the moment. 😔

I’ll be recovering from this treatment, but I’ll still be around to share bits and bobs. 😉

© 2020 by Lisa Marino and Blackbird Serenity, LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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Minipress (Prazosin) for Stress Nightmares in PTSD

Miss Poison Complex PTSD, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder , , , ,

https://www.verywellhealth.com/prazosin-treats-nightmares-in-ptsd-3015222

The other day, a woman started a fight with me over this drug. Yeah, I know; it was completely obnoxious and she acted as if I was forcing it down her throat. Obviously, that was not the case.

Her major issue is that it didn’t work for her, so she was blasting it and claiming all kinds of things that simply aren’t true. Your experience and the experience of thousands who take it is not the same. Please don’t bash a drug that helps people.

This drug was created for combat veterans so that there was an inexpensive option to help with nightmares and flashbacks, major side effects of PTSD and Complex-PTSD. Every person’s body is different and requires a different dose, providing it works for them. 19 to 20 mgs in my norm, but I am currently on 2 mgs and building back up to the higher dose. I would not do that if it didn’t offer some relief.

I’ve taken this medication for almost three years. I have zero side effects, except a slower wake up period in the morning if I’m on a higher dose and haven’t given myself an additional thirty minutes to fully wake up and shake off the sleepiness. For me, that is no big deal. It has not made me more depressed, more suicidal, or any such thing this person was claiming “That’s all it does.” Untrue. If it works for you, it will work, period. Your dosing may be different than mine, but that’s a discussion to have with a highly trusted psychiatrist. Period.

I’ve said it before; I am grateful for my doctor. Out of the handful I am forced to deal with, he is the most stress-free individual to talk to. He often e-mails me back within 10-15 minutes of a question. He calls to check on me when he has spare time and hasn’t heard from me in a while, especially when he knows I am struggling. I’ve never had a doctor who actually cares, so I firmly believe that all the horrible shit I went through for so long lead me to the right doctor. I am extremely grateful for that.

When he first presented me with this medication as an option, he let me know that if it didn’t work, no harm, no foul. He also didn’t force it on me; it was my decision completely to start taking it and give it a chance to work. He let me know that it leaves the system quickly (within a few hours) and could not harm me. Who am I going to trust? Some psycho who is attacking the drug or my doctor of three years? Yeah, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that one out.

This medication helps me, but it is not an exact science. If you are suffering from either form of PTSD, or both, talk to your doctor about it. I endorse it, but obviously, I am not shoving it down anyone’s throat and forcing them to take it. And I am NOT paid by Mylan or Teva Pharmaceuticals to say I stand behind this medication.