Plagued

Video Miss Poison Chronic Pain, Fibromyalgia, Honesty, Pain, Pieces Of Me, Writing, , , , ,

beinginpain

I’ve been plagued by pain in so many ways over the last week and a half, that I really haven’t been able to finish anything I’ve started to write. Work, at the moment, is that thing I should be doing, but can’t because sitting here for 5-12 hours editing is excruciatingly painful. I won’t lie; I feel a tremendous amount of guilt over it. I shouldn’t, but I do.

I have been extraordinarily exhausted. If I’m up longer than 12 hours, I will start to fall asleep wherever I am. By 6:20 last night, I seriously thought about getting into my bed without my favorite blanket. I went downstairs to pull it out of the dryer, basking in its warmth. There’s something incredibly cozy about a blanket fresh from the dryer, especially when you have chills and need to go to bed. Once again, I was in bed before the sun went into set mode. Sometimes it’s just a 3-5 hour nap, and other times, like last night, it was a total “lights out” moment. I rarely sleep straight through the night. I woke up once sometime after one to yell about something (it might have been my wicked next door neighbor’s new dog, which must have come home with them from their vacation because they’ve never had a dog since moving in. The dog, naturally, is as annoying as they are. It barks at its own shadow, and everything else it can see. I don’t want to hear your dog at 1:00 a.m. or 5:00 a.m. Train the beast! I’d be able to tune it out if their backyard wasn’t right on top of my bedroom window.) and after that I didn’t wake up until kitten walked on my head. As supreme “can opener”, this makes me a favorite between cat and kitten. Especially since kitten is always hungry, unless she’s sleeping.

I haven’t had much to say this week. I have ideas and other things swirling inside my head, all of which will come to fruition at some point, but mostly I am tired, stressed, and in so much pain, it’s hard to see straight.

You have absolutely no idea how much time you spend sitting until sitting becomes the single most painful thing you can do. My back and I are at odds. Every single thing is painful. Walking, standing, bending down to pick something up off the floor, even being in bed is uncomfortable. I lucked out yesterday and was finally able to do the laundry I hadn’t been able to do over the weekend. I didn’t want to make my back any worse after Saturday morning. It’s bruised, sore, and achy, but I think with continued rest, it will be all right. If it’s not, you can all send me weird things while I’m in the hospital (No cheese, Lucy! LOL.).

I hope everyone is having a happy, productive week. Me? I’m glad it’s almost over.

copyright © 2015 by Lisa Marino & Blackbird Serenity LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

For the record, I am still young & vibrant. Therein lies the problem!
For the record, I am still young & vibrant. Therein lies the problem!

15 thoughts on “Plagued”

    • Thanks hon! I’m trying, but my body seems to have other plans. I’m grateful to wake up without pain after back-to-back migraines between last night into this morning. That second dose of medicine around 2:00 a.m. seems to have done the trick. I was looking for one type of medicine and found something else. I’m SO thankful that it worked.

      I hope you’re doing well too.

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      • I’m glad you got a bit of relief 🙂
        I’m not having a great day. I’m recovering from a day out at a doctor’s appointment yesterday. It always takes me a day or two to recover after being in a car and walking around for any length of time. So today is legs elevated on the couch 🙂
        Try to enjoy your weekedn 🙂

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        • I experience the same thing when I have to travel, walk, run errands, etc. The only time I feel good is on vacation, believe it or not. I can walk for miles on end and be okay the next day. On a 10-14 day vacation, I usually only need a day or two in total to “recover” during the entire trip. It’s SO bizarre. By the time I leave the house and get to the departing gate at my airport, I’ve already walked at least three miles. I end up with bruised shoulders from carrying my purse and carry-on, but it’s worth it. By the time I land, I’m still energized. But regular life stuff? That causes me pain and flares, etc. The second I’m on the couch, I generally don’t want to move, but these days it’s just not comfortable for me. I do, however, relate entirely.

          I have to mentally gear up for the weekend. It’s a little stressful when I know I can’t just hang out in my PJ’s and rest.

          Be well. Don’t be a stranger. 🙂

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            • I don’t know where it comes from, really. I suspect it’s the fact that when I’m away, I have a lot of love and support, no one is judging me if I need to rest or go to bed early, etc., whereas at home, it’s pretty isolating. I love cat and kitten tremendously, and I haven’t gone away since adopting either of them, but I know that when I do, they will miss me. I also know that they’ll be fine. The second I get on a plane, I leave all the stress behind. I’m saving my miles to visit one of my best friends in Israel. 🙂

              I would just pace myself, which is exactly what I do. I also wear a pedometer so I can clock exactly how much I’ve walked each day. It’s amazing how quickly it adds up. On one day trip I walked 16 miles around this small town. I thought it was impossible, but it made me feel really good that I was able to push myself. I took breaks when I needed to. I’m not saying it didn’t hurt, but I’d rather bruise a bit than not do anything when I’m away.

              I pray this will happen for you too. 🙂

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              • I’ve never thought about tracking my steps. I’m going to get myself a pedometer! Thanks for that idea. I think it is important to track what your body can cope with. I’ve just been doing it according to when the pain spikes, but this is a great idea!
                I hope you accumulate the miles soon so you can enjoy some time with your best friend 🙂

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                • I’ve had mine for five years, I believe. It was a really good investment, I paid under $60 for it and it’s paid for itself. All I’ve had to do with it is change the battery and adjust it for my height and weight, it also has the time on it, which is nice since I don’t wear a watch. It tracks miles, calories burned, and individual steps. I put it on as soon as I get dressed (it attaches to the front pocket of any pair of pants) and by the time I leave the house I’ve clocked 1/3 of a mile, sometimes more. For me, running errands is usually two miles worth of walking, sometimes three. There are days when that is way too much, and other days I could keep going. I’ve learned, through using it, how to pace myself.

                  I’ve been accumulating miles for over 10 years, so I’m nearly there, though I don’t know if I’ll use it for the flight. Sometimes it’s not worth it. Every airline is different. I’ve offered the miles to her several times, so we’ll see who uses them and who doesn’t. LOL.

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