Quotes

When A Person Screams In Pain

Quote Miss Poison Pain, Quotes , , , ,

“When a person screams in pain, the actual pain is only half the noise they make. The other half is the terror at being forced to accept that they exist.” ―Noah Cicero

For the better part of this year, this is precisely how I have felt. My pain is getting worse (it is damn near uncontrollable) and I’ve been met with nothing but useless doctors who truly do not deserve their titles. Next month I see a new doctor, and I hope and pray that someone will lead me to the root cause and will start treating me like a human-being who is suffering greatly, and losing an enormous chunk of her life in the process. All I want is someone to treat me properly, instead of giving me the runaround.

If you follow me on social media, my life might seem “normal”. It isn’t. I might have that one day where I was able to walk four miles, and then pay for it with a week or two in bed, with nothing but Cat and Kitten to keep me company, as I desperately try to get the heating pad to be my friend and help ease some of the pain, and it will help temporarily until I pass out from sheer exhaustion. More nights than I care to count, I cannot get comfortable or sleep, because my mind is so overactive, it’s painful. I’ve noticed of late that my mind races when I AM asleep, and the pain leaves me unable to move, speak, or silence my brain. Apparently, my brain is running marathons. 😦 There are days I am crawling because of the pain, and then there’s that one good day, or a good chunk of hours, but it usually results in an insanely early bed-time, which results in my waking up in the early morning hours, in tears from how much pain I am in.

I cry a lot lately. The things so many people take for granted, like restful sleep or a ten minute shower, are things I can’t do. I can sleep if I take the PTSD medication and go to bed within an hour or so, because it drops my blood pressure, but the medication will often wear off in the middle of the night. It only has a two hour half-life within the body, so I’m still trying to hit the right dose. I’ve been able to knock my shower time down from an hour to under thirty minutes, and I turn the water off in between each physical task, but it is often exhausting and draining. Instead of taking four or five hours to get ready, I can now be ready in about two hours, but still, I pay for it the following day. I hurt SO bad, that there are days I just can’t do what I need to, and that destroys me.

So much bothers me, and I’m keeping it all inside. When the heart and soul can’t speak, that’s a whole new level of pain one should never know.

He Is Not Dead

Quote Miss Poison In Memory, Quotes , , ,

“I cannot say, and I will not say
That he is dead. He is just away.
With a cheery smile, and a wave of the hand,
He has wandered into an unknown land
And left us dreaming how very fair
It needs must be, since he lingers there.
And you—oh you, who the wildest yearn
For an old-time step, and the glad return,
Think of him faring on, as dear
In the love of There as the love of Here.
Think of him still as the same. I say,
He is not dead—he is just away.”
―James Whitcomb Riley

In memory of my Uncle, who would have been sixty-five today. Te amo.

When Dealing With A Difficult Person

Quote Miss Poison Quotes , , ,

“When dealing with a difficult person, all that matters from a spiritual standpoint is how you react and treat the person. It’s not about getting the other person to change or agree with you. Your spiritual growth is all about the way that YOU deal with the relationship, the person, and the situation. Even if the situation would justify you acting harshly, resist this temptation. Ask for heaven to purify and uplift your thoughts and feelings so that everything you do and say is aligned with Divine Love. This is the path and purpose of the lightworker. This is why you are here.” —Doreen Virtue

Fall In Love

Quote Miss Poison Love, Quotes , ,

“Fall in love with someone who wants you, who waits for you, who understands you. Someone who helps you, and guides you, someone who is your support, your hope. Fall in love with someone who talks with you after a fight. Fall in love with someone who misses you and wants to be with you. Do not fall in love only with a body or with a face; or with the idea of being in love.” –Unknown Quote Origins

Sometimes You Have To Lose To Win…

Quote Miss Poison Inspiration, Quotes , , , ,

“Life sure can hit you hard! Suddenly, when you least expect it, WHAM; life has a knack for challenging you in ways that you don’t feel prepared for. I feel like life sometimes tests and shapes you in a manner in which you feel least equipped. It seems you don’t get to choose the exercise equipment God challenges and builds your strength with.

When this is happening, it’s easy to drop into a victim mindset. It’s easy to feel stuck, defeated, and like you are a losing player in the game of life. This victim mindset argues (very loudly) that we have lost; that nothing good is on the horizon. Never forget that the volume of an argument does not reflect the validity of the argument. Just because the victim mentality argues that we are losing, doesn’t mean that it’s true. In fact, I have come to realize that during the times in my life where I thought I was losing, I was actually winning.

An empowered perspective helps me see that I can only get stronger when working against resistance. It is when I struggle that I strengthen. It is when challenged to my core that I learn the depth of who I am. It is when we feel broken that we can become experts at mending.

I am who I am because the tears of my past have watered the magnificence of my present. It is from my broken hearts that I learned the measure and power of true love. Every job I was denied for… opened the door to new opportunities. Every relationship that hurt me… led me to my true love. Every mistake I thought would be the end of me… pointed me towards an incredible success. Sometimes when you think you’re losing, you’re winning.”

–Steve Maraboli