Social Media | Written by LISA MARINO-Molchanova

I openly admit that social media annoys me. You can pretty much guarantee you will never see me using Twitter. I adamantly refuse. If you cannot read and follow it here, you don’t need to see it in an alternate place.

I have a minor addiction to Pinterest, which has waned a bit in the past year, but it’s still a fun form of social media that’s harmless, kind of like Candy Crush Saga, which I play on three different devices- because I’m a nut job! This platform has a Facebook presence, as do I, but that’s as far as I am personally willing to take the madness, outside of Goodreads, which I have been a part of since 2008. Aside from four utter whack jobs on Facebook, I find it all pretty tame, and oftentimes, quite boring and uninteresting.

One of the key issues I have with social media is that it takes away from the time I could spend writing. I don’t just mean writing here, but writing on a whole. Like any other artist, I don’t like being distracted. I can’t always listen to a person talking or even listen to music when I am writing, because I am so focused on what my brain needs me to type, that I cannot divide my attention, nor should I.

I think there’s great power in social media if used correctly. If you take away the cyber-bullying, hate mongers, and negativity, there are a lot of very positive things accomplished via social media. My absolute BEST example would be Stephen Amell.

If you don’t know who Stephen is, you’re probably living under a rock, don’t own a television, and have never picked up a magazine in which he is featured for one good thing or another. For those of you who fall into all three categories, Stephen is the star of the CW’s hit show Arrow, which just premiered its 3rd season this past Wednesday in the U.S.

Stephen is that rare person in the public eye (I’m not going to use the word celebrity, it reeks of douche-baggery.) who uses his position for wonderful things. He runs his own Facebook page entirely, and you can tell because there is an accessibility to him that says so much about the kind of man he is. He, through the power of social media, has helped raise funds for Prayers For Sophie, Saving Jojo, and Fuck Cancer. He auctions all sorts of things off personally on eBay. Don’t believe me? Go and check out his auction listings, they are legit. He takes the time to communicate with his fans via video updates, does Q&A’s, comments on MemeMonday, promotes FanArt Friday, and he does all of this in his downtime while filming, as well as in between seasons. He is a genuine power for good, and I truly respect him as a person for how hilarious and real he is. He’s very clearly not putting on a persona or spewing garbage, he’s simply a man that was blessed with a dream job for any actor, and pays it forward with an immense amount of kindness, courtesy, and respect.

He is the rare social media genius that is more than meets the eye. In truth, he could rest on his laurels, film Arrow, and not extend himself any further, but he is constantly in touch with his fan base, clearly reads what people post, and I think that speaks accolades for him. No, he doesn’t know me and he didn’t pay me to say any of this, it’s all stuff I’ve been thinking for over a year now. He is, 100%, a class act.

Even if you don’t watch the show, which would be terrible indeed, give Stephen a follow on Facebook (Stephen Amell), Twitter (@amellywood), or whatever form of social media you happen to like and feel comfortable with. He has a YouTube page, follow that and allow yourself to laugh. If you love wine and want to try some interesting, affordable bottles, I suggest following Nocking Point Wines. If you don’t see what I see by following him for two months, then I strongly suggest getting your eyes checked and your I.Q. tested.

I do follow other people, like many of us do, but I’m not seeing any of the positivity, warmth, or light that Stephen exudes. I am not seeing the openness of spirit and kindness, and in a lot of ways, I’m glad it’s not universal because it allows me to respect him more.

I write stories, and I write facts and opinions. I’ve done that for 27 years. Stephen tells stories weekly on Arrow as the lead character, doing damn near all of his own stunts, and his reach in that position stretches further than my writing and editing experience does. And yet, I will not deny watching the show, enjoying it, and respecting him as a person when the make-up and the Arrow suit come off.

When a person does good things, they very easily earn your respect. He has earned mine, and he’s also shown me that social media isn’t always an ugly, vicious thing. However, I still refuse to use Twitter.

Rudeness

I’ve recently come to see precisely how intolerant I am towards a key group of people in this world. This isn’t about race or religion, it’s about basic common courtesy and manners. At the core of who I am, I am supremely fair and I am all about having exceptional manners.

Is it rude for me to politely and respectfully request that someone not come along and post my work, without asking, on their own blogs? I don’t think that’s a disrespectful request, not in the least. I suppose if I was a real bitch about it, it could be perceived as rude, but a polite, respectful, properly worded “Can you please remove this?” or “If you are going to do this, please ask first.” is not a great sin.

I realize most bloggers don’t care much who reblogs their stuff, but I am a writer who blogs, as opposed to a blogger, and I own all of my own copyrights. If someone comes along who I do not know and they don’t leave a comment saying “This is wonderful. I love it, is it all right for me to share it on my blog?”, and they assume it’s ok to do so because there’s a Reblog button available to everyone, then I am going to respectfully ask that it be removed. I’m not being a bitch, I am encouraging others to be original, and I am asking them not to place what I have chosen to do somewhere else. Asking if you can share it is pretty much an automatic “Yes”, not asking me is going to make me angry. No one here was born yesterday, we all know about manners & decency. Moreover, I don’t care if it shows my blog as the originator, it still feels like plagiarism to me. That is the ultimate NO for all writers.

I was reblogged a handful of times over the last few weeks and I very kindly asked those people to ask me first before doing it, and to please take it down. I wasn’t rude, I wasn’t nasty. I know the difference between my words and the tone. I then receive an e-mail, as if I am some kind of idiot or small child, with a list of instructions on how to ward off idiots on social media. My hand to God, I had the HARDEST time not unleashing my wrath. It might still happen, except for the simple fact that I like to maintain my level professionalism, even when dealing with complete and utter morons.

Here’s the most important thing for people to know on any form of social media: If it’s public domain, do what you will. Tweets, photos, memes, they’re going to be all over the place, it’s a given. However, if there is a copyright on something, especially on a blog or writer’s platform, DON’T FUCKING ASSUME YOU CAN USE IT. Even if you don’t see a copyright posted, quickly ask the blogger, writer, creator, just in case. It is not beneath me, the writer, to issue a Cease & Desist. I’ve had to do it in the past to someone overseas who stole my work and my photos and declared all of it her own, and I will not hesitate to do it again. If you wouldn’t steal out of a person’s wallet on line at a store, why would you steal on the Internet? Again, if something is public domain, have at it, but if it’s not? Ask first, because good manners goes a long way with someone like me, and many other writers don’t take kindly to their work being stolen. Again, it is tantamount to plagiarism and for me, that puts you on my Bitch Slap list. There’s no nice way to say it.

I don’t reblog a lot of things. When I do, I tend to go to great lengths to ask whomever it is if it’s all right with them. If it is public domain, I issue credit to the person when I post it. If I post a quote, I make sure whomever the quote came from is credited. If I post a photo that is not my own, I do not remove any of the tags or copyrights that might be pending on the photo. I don’t Photoshop anything in an attempt to make it my own. I have rules and boundaries, and we all should.

I would rather be overly cautious and polite, than rude and presumptive. I realize that in this day and age, I am a rarity, but I’ve gotten this far with my ethos, so I’m not worried about continuing with this particular cycle.

You will, inevitably, encounter a lot of rude idiots on the Internet and all across the board on various social media platforms. I’m happy to say I will never be one of them.