(Author’s Note: Happy Canada Day!)

I don’t like being preached to. I’m sure most of us don’t. By “preach”, I mean someone on their high horse with an agenda who is an absolute know-it-all and doesn’t know when to stop.

Initially I let it slide because it wasn’t a daily diet, but now… It’s gotten so bad that I’ve nearly said “Enough!” and “Shut the fuck up!” multiple times within a few days, as if I’m a cast member on The Real Housewives of insert whichever city you watch. Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.

I know someone who talks to me like I am an uneducated moron (she’s one of many, but I’ll stay on topic) with the I.Q. of a donkey. I liken it to when I’m blonde and people talk to me slowly, as if I won’t catch half of what they’re saying. This changes the second I go back to being a brunette, but I digress… She has been a part of something for about eight years compared to my involvement for, oh, my ENTIRE LIFE. Call me insane, but I feel that gives me the advantage in terms of knowledge, but you know how know-it-alls are. If it’s not coming from them, it’s as if it’s never been said before. The fact that there’s mileage between us is the only reason I haven’t choked her to death. I’ve actually said “This has to stop.” repeatedly, but she doesn’t seem to be able to comprehend what I am saying.

I do not believe in getting into arguments via social media. If I have something to say, I will say it. I don’t need to hide behind my computer, tablet, or phone. I’m direct to the point of being terrifying, and I really don’t care if that bothers someone. I don’t care if you’re a friend, family member, or a fucking stranger, I am NOT going to engage with an asshole. Factoring in that this particular subject has been brought up repeatedly via phone calls, e-mail, text message, and now Facebook, I’ve HAD IT. I tried listening. I tried being kind. Hell, I repeatedly tried changing the subject. But no… The insanity is ever-present.

I’m not two. Even at two, I still made a lot of my own decisions. No one has ever told me what to think, how to believe, who to trust, how to view the world, etc. So please explain to me why anyone that knows me for even 20 minutes feels the need to do so?! I haven’t had a lobotomy. I am aware of what goes on in this world, but it is not my life’s work to “convince” people and bring them over to my way of thinking. I’m not a recruiter. Telling people they should think for themselves and then telling them what to think is called hypocrisy and I am many things, but a hypocrite isn’t one of them. I suspect she gets this nasty little habit from her mother. (She’s not going to read this and yes, we are related.)

We are all entitled to think the way we want to think and have our own personal beliefs. Even if you’re a moron or a douchebag, your thoughts are something no one can steal from you. I wish they would, but I stand by my word. However, I’m not going to be told I should “feel guilty” for “not doing more” to help with what she has decided is her life’s work when I know for a fact that it is not mine. I don’t need to come over to anyone else’s way of thinking if my beliefs do not coincide. Unlike the person in question, I know my limitations. I know when to say no, I know when to say enough, and I know when to say STOP.

I’ve decided that the healthiest thing to do is put some serious space between this person and I. If I allow the nuttiness to continue, the next words out of my mouth will be “Shut.The.Fuck.Up! Learn something else to talk about.” Harsh? Not if you knew this person. There is only so much I can listen to on a loop and the same topic every single day isn’t exactly a Billboard Top 100. So, I am going to ignore all e-mails, phone calls, and text messages until she buys a clue, or a vowel.

How do you deal with preachy nut jobs? Please let me know in the comments.